Friday, March 1, 2013

La La La La La ... But ....

So, today's post is a rant. Not a political rant. Not a rant about here, or a rant about there, nor a rant about anywhere (for you Dr. Suess fans out there). I promise, it won't be too big of a Debbie Downer, but still I need to rant.

Why is it that we, as women, find it necessary to tear each other down in order to feel better about ourselves? I, for the life of me, do not understand this cultural anomaly. We, as women, have a hard road to trod. One would think that we would be as supportive of each other as possible. But, sadly, that isn't so.

This past week I've had to "let go" of some comments that an extended family member directed toward me. Is this new behavior? No. Is it an unusual dynamic in our relationship? No. However, it still cuts like a knife, no matter how much I try to "let it go." Maybe it's because I'm an oldest child, but I really expect people to like me. I don't expect everyone to think I'm the "cat's meow." However, I have sufficient evidence to support that for the most part, I'm a very nice person, and people, in general think I'm a nice person. So, how come I get dumped on by someone who should be part of my support system?

Well ... I happen to know that the truth is ... [insert drum roll here] ... she is intimidated by me and the small amount of success that I've had in my life. The sad part is, I would be the first person jumping up and down cheerleading for her if she were to allow herself to have the same types of experiences.

Long ago I read the book by Stephen Covey entitled "The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People." He talked about the Zero Sum game. "If you are winning then I am losing. If I am winning, then you must lose." HOW COME WE CAN'T ALL WIN? I'd like to know. As far as I'm concerned you are all winners. I don't always win, but I'm moving forward, none the same, and for me, that is winning. I would bet that you could say the same thing as well.

So ... girls (I still like to think of myself as a girl, even though I'm in my late 40's) ... let's be a little more supportive and help everyone around us to feel like winners. You know ... it doesn't really take a whole lot of effort, either to do that. A small compliment, a smile at the store to someone who looks like they are having a bad day, a "congratulations" when someone gets a promotion or a raise, or a job, or, or, or, etc.

In the meantime, I've created a Freebie Friday for you that is definitely "Tongue in Cheek." I saw this vintage painting of 1840's fashion and the sarcasm of the moment just sprung out of my brain and onto the page. You'll see what I mean when you click on it and read the commentary. I promise ... it will either get a chuckle out of you, or it may sting a little. Because, you see, many times we as women do our best "Catty" impersonations under the "guise" of being supportive or "helpful." Well sisters ... that doesn't cut it either. And, don't you find it always seems to be that this "helpfulness" is usually couched by starting out as a positive statement, followed by the word "BUT" and then the knife comes out!

Okay ... thank you for letting me get my rant out. I feel so much better and I hope you will too when you think about how much of a "winner" you are (and please, please, please, do not think about Charlie Sheen's rant about "winning" - I promise you shouldn't go there either!).

So, sweet amies ... here is your free printable. As always, feel free to click on the picture and save to your computer or print out. It might just help you accept my challenge to be more supportive of the women in your life this week. Let me know how you do, and I will too.

Bonsoir, and have a WONDERFUL weekend!!

Lorraine

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